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	<title>AbsoluteGenius &#187; Jackson James Wood</title>
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	<description>A blog of politics, satire and absolute genius</description>
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		<title>Viva La Revolución</title>
		<link>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/460</link>
		<comments>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/460#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 31 Aug 2010 22:06:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jackson James Wood</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jackson James Wood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[economic serfdom]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[running pig dogs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Satire]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[socialism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[South Canterbury Finance]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Tis a glorious day in the Peoples&#8217; Republic of New Zealand when our most trustworthy and benevolent National Government nationalise—by semi-violent means—and return to the workers of Aotearoa vast tracts of arable land, productive dairy cows from which a new generation of proletarian babies will suckle and grow strong and massive piles of toxic debt [...]]]></description>
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		<title>An open letter to John Key</title>
		<link>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/446</link>
		<comments>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/446#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 03 Aug 2010 06:39:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jackson James Wood</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jackson James Wood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[depression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Key]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mental illness]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Dear John Key, I take umbrage at your comments about Chris Carter’s mental health as reported by stuff.co.nz today. Sometimes you can&#8217;t tell a person is sick just by looking at them. So it is unfair of you to say that Mr Carter looks well and that he should have to prove to New Zealand that [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Files, Flies and Fawkes</title>
		<link>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/382</link>
		<comments>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/382#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 18 May 2010 22:49:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jackson James Wood</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jackson James Wood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Files]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Flies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Satire]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Like Nicky Hager before me, I have magically obtained an email that helps explain Monday&#8217;s bomb threat in the Beehive. Unfortunately, this fliesian Fawkes formulation was foiled, with the Beehive being evacuated and no maggots laid.]]></description>
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		<title>Key&#8217;s Key Convictions</title>
		<link>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/359</link>
		<comments>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/359#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 16 May 2010 02:09:45 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jackson James Wood</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jackson James Wood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Key]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[New Zealand]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Satire]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.absolutegeni.us/?p=359</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This week&#8217;s Sunday Star Times posed 50 questions to Prime Minister Key from famous New Zealanders. Unfortunately, his entire press team were away when he first got the request from the SST. AbsoulteGenius was lucky enough to have been leaked his original answers. 1. Sir Colin Meads, former All Black: Do you think you are [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
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		<title>McCully&#8217;s Kobayashi Maru</title>
		<link>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/289</link>
		<comments>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/289#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 09 Jan 2010 21:40:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jackson James Wood</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jackson James Wood]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.absolutegeni.us/?p=289</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Spock: The Kobayashi Maru scenario frequently wreaks havoc on students and equipment. As I recall you took the test three times yourself. Your final solution was, shall we say, unique? Kirk: It had the virtue of never having been tried. Anyone who has seen Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan and of course the [...]]]></description>
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		<title>The Vintner&#8217;s Luck—review</title>
		<link>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/281</link>
		<comments>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/281#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 24 Nov 2009 22:43:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jackson James Wood</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jackson James Wood]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.absolutegeni.us/?p=281</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I have always prided myself on being economic with words. Vintner&#8217;s Luck can be summed up thusly: &#8220;Wine. Fallen angel. Breast cancer. Fungicide. Keisha&#8217;s tits.&#8221; It is tempting to leave it at that. But that wouldn&#8217;t be doing it justice and justice is what needs to be done. I  had been pondering movies to compare [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Spot the Difference</title>
		<link>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/223</link>
		<comments>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/223#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Sep 2009 09:20:06 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jackson James Wood</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jackson James Wood]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.absolutegeni.us/?p=223</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[An avid reader of AbsoluteGenius pointed out this remarkable resemblance to me earlier. Spot the difference You can almost imagine Joyce pranking Dr Paul Reynolds: &#8220;This is your doctor. I have your pregnancy report here, and guess what. You got knocked up.&#8221; This is of course all just an excuse to post the greatest music [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Dispiriting Dispatch Derth</title>
		<link>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/211</link>
		<comments>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/211#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 02 Sep 2009 04:49:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jackson James Wood</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jackson James Wood]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.absolutegeni.us/?p=211</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[There is no interesting news in New Zealand. There is nothing that excites me. No news writers that make me feel passionate about news. A high school letting students drink at a ball is not news. It is a good idea. A dress code enforced Gang patches banned in an effort to cheat people into [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Plebiscite Picture Panorama</title>
		<link>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/195</link>
		<comments>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/195#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 01 Sep 2009 03:35:37 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jackson James Wood</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jackson James Wood]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.absolutegeni.us/?p=195</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[In the run-up to last month&#8217;s indicative, non-binding referendum, Daniel and I presented a third option to the box-tickers of NZ: defacing the ballot before sending it back to the electoral commission. Unfortunately, not many people did this. There were 1,682,717 countable votes, 10,421 (0.62%) of which were &#8220;informal&#8221;—the voter didn&#8217;t clearly indicate their response. [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Banal Blogging Block</title>
		<link>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/172</link>
		<comments>http://www.absolutegeni.us/archives/172#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 31 Aug 2009 11:48:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jackson James Wood</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jackson James Wood]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.absolutegeni.us/?p=172</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I know I haven&#8217;t been the most regular of writers. I don&#8217;t stick to my diet of blogging branflakes like many other bloggers—shitting out gems of blog genius every other hour. To prove just how useless I am at blogging, here is a blog I started about three years ago before I went to China [...]]]></description>
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